Lessons from Cinderella

I love movies, I always have. But I am not the kind of girl who enjoys actually going to a cinema, buying popcorn and watching a new movie – I am the kind of girl who will wait until the movie comes out on DVD, rent it and watch it from the comfort of my own home, on my own couch and with my own blanket (and usually with my fellow movie loving Mom & snuggle partner dog Kiwi). So, recently when I found myself taking part in a non-stop home movie marathon – the new (which is actually old now) Cinderella was definitely on the list.

What I didn’t realize was that this well-loved children’s fairytale that has always been one of my favorites, would hit something much deeper on the inside of me. If you haven’t yet watched the BRILLIANT version of Disney’s Cinderella, you need to! Apart from the sweet story line, the set is incredible and the costumes are stunning. If you maybe have never seen nor heard about the story of Cinderella, well I am sorry that I am from Africa and I have and you haven’t (joke) – so with that being said, here are the 4 lessons I learned from Cinderella:

1. Have Courage

Just before Cinderella’s mother is about to die, she tells her daughter to have courage – what a timely thing to say when without the young girl knowing it, she is about to face a world of troubles.

Courage = the ability to do something that frightens one; bravery and strength in the face of pain or grief. Courage is something that God desires of us as His people. Why? Because He knows the world is tough but He has planned us for such a time as this and has given us the ability to do things that frighten us not because of our own power but because of who He is on the inside of us. What He told Joshua, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9 NKJV) still applies to us today.

2. Be Kind

Cinderella’s mother tells her daughter that she has “more kindness in her little finger than some have in their whole body” – and that her kindness is “powerful”

Kindness = the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate; a kind act. This is a powerful attribute to possess as a believer; in fact the Bible says that it is God’s goodness (kindness) that leads people to repentance (Romans 2:4). Our kindness that we share in the lives of those we come in contact with is a tool that God can use to bring them back to Him. Kindness also is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), so when we demonstrate kindness, we are showing evidence of the Greater One living on the inside of us.

3. Just because something is done doesn’t mean that it is supposed to be done

I love this part, Cinderella has met the Prince while he is on a hunting expedition in the forest – because of her love of animals, she asks him not to harm one of them to which he humorously responds that they are ‘hunting’ (like, duh woman – hunting generally means killing an animal) – but her statement of, “just because something is done doesn’t mean that it is supposed to be done” leaves one taking into consideration more than just a game of cat and mouse.

We have to be so careful in this day and age. Deception is increasing in the world and things that are actually rebellious to God and His Word are being promoted as “good.” If we think about it, how much do we do in a day that we actually don’t know if it is truly right or wrong, we just do it because its “always been done” [John Bevere has come out with a powerful word on “Good or God” which I encourage you to research for more detail on this topic].

4. Forgiveness

Ooooh the climax of the movie when the Prince has just come and fitted the glass slipper and is about to take Cinderella back to the palace with him – she turns to her step mother, looks her in the eye and says something that sends chills down my spine…”I forgive you.”

Forgiveness = The action or process of forgiving or being forgiven; to stop feeling anger toward someone who has done something wrong. to stop blaming someone; to stop requiring payment. Probably on of the toughest areas ever, but is one of the most important because when we don’t forgive, God cannot forgive us (Matthew 6:14; Luke 6:37). I want you to note that Cinderella’s stepmother never asked for forgiveness, yet regardless, she forgave her. We need to strive to be like this. Many times people won’t ask for forgiveness, but the choices we make will determine the outcome of our lives.

I hope you don’t think I am nutty or “over spiritual” to parallel a fairytale with God’s Word – but I believe that this life on earth is a journey and there are lessons to be learned and these lessons are sometimes found in places where we least expect it.

Quit stepping on my Toes

Recently Chad and I have started attending ballroom dance lessons. The reason is simply that my mom made the following very clear, “I will not be paying for a wedding where everyone comes and watches you sway.” – so, hello ballroom dance lessons.

Needless to say, Chad despises dancing so for him to be sent to learn how to do the “two-step” was like asking for him to have teeth pulled – painful. BUT, the man loves me (and values his life) so we had our first lesson.

It was a disaster. It felt rigid, awkward and nothing like I had fantasized it would be like in my head. The part that got me was the fact that the giant big-foot otherwise known as my fiancé, kept stepping on my toes! I got so frustrated and instead of having grace and accepting the fact that this was our first time – I got more and more angry and eventually told Chad to “go sit in the car” – sadly, this is real life people. But God, with the major sense of humor He has – used this as an opportunity to teach me a valuable lesson and gave me an opportunity to change my perspective.

The fact of the matter is – Chad was not stepping on my toes on purpose. He wasn’t trying to hurt me, upset me or even stop me from dancing. Yet my reaction gave the idea that he was “out to get me.” Isn’t this so true in life? We often tend to be so touchy that the smallest action of an individual towards us, whether intentional or not, can set us off onto a war-path. We can be so sensitive that people feel like they need to tiptoe around us. This isn’t right nor is it what God requires of us.

James 3:16 – “For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.” (NKJV)

Self-seeking can also be translated from its Greek word to mean: rivalry or a feud. Also very commonly known as strife, which is arguing, quarrelling or fighting.When we let these things take up root in our hearts – they become who we are and our first reaction to a situation. But the Bible also says in this passage of Scripture – that the above are not from heavenly wisdom, but from earthy, sensual and devilish wisdom.

People are people, they are going to frustrate us, disappoint us and even make us mad – but how we respond to them determines who we are and what is on the inside of us. Strife happens when we respond to a situation negatively. We have to make the decision to not be a contributor of strife – and instead, work on being patient as love is, and forgive. People are going to step on our toes – its inevitable, but I am sure that there are many times we have unintentionally stepped on someone else’s toes – may we have the grace to forgive them just as they forgave us.

“A person who cannot forgive is a person who has forgotten what He has been forgiven of.” – John Bevere

I want what She’s got!

But you are not her and she is not you.

Women are awesome. As I get older – I realize more and more how truly incredible females are: they are beautiful in appearance, tender in nature and strong in character.

Yet, this is still not enough.

We live in a day and an age where another woman is the competition. If she’s pretty, she’s wearing too much make-up, if she’s sweet, she’s probably fake and if she has a good-looking man on her arm, well then quite frankly she must be sleeping with him. WHAT IS WRONG WITH US?! Well the answer is actually a lot simpler than I am sure we would like to acknowledge:

Comparison has become the thief of our joy.

 When we are not comfortable in our own skin – we take this very common insecurity out on other people. It has been said commonly – “the eyes that you view yourself with, are the same eyes that you will view others with.” This might not be true in your life, but it sure has been in mine. There have been countless times I have woken up, looked in the mirror and not liked what I saw, so to cure this I would spend the rest of the day finding reasons others may look worse – just to make myself feel better.

Many times, we look at the lives others lead and our own inadequacy flashes in our faces to a point where we find ourselves wanting what they have. We are quick to forget that things are not always as sunny as they may seem and every woman has struggles to work through and obstacles to overcome.

The point is – she is not you, and you are not her.

God has given you unlimited potential to do GREAT things – things that He has created YOU to do. There are gifts, talents and abilities that are on the inside of you and are unique to you. Whether you choose to acknowledge it or not, there is a generation crying out for what you’ve got (seems unthinkable right?) – crying out for what God has put on the inside of you to serve to the world. Are you going to rob the world of what you have because you are so stuck comparing yourself with others instead of taking what God has put on the inside of you and working on changing a generation?

(Side note: I want you to know as you read this that I am being very careful about writing this – these words are not out of a place of judgment but out of being in the same boat. The struggle really is real and nobody is alone in it.)

Maybe its time we stop seeing other women as the competition and instead see them as the joint force they are – a mighty sisterhood that has the ability to advance the Kingdom of God here on earth with their unique and wonderful talents. May we become women who praise others instead of tearing them down, be hospitable instead of cold and supportive instead of threatened.

To deny your own magnificence is to deny that the Creator of your very breath did a “good enough” job.

It is much easier said than done – but we can be so much more effective in life if we just choose to focus on the job God has given us to do instead of criticizing and gossiping about the job He’s given someone else. Actually, I have learned that you don’t want the job He has given someone else because He has given them the grace to do it and not me. I would then just be a hindrance to something wonderful. We can go through life constantly comparing ourselves to others – but when we one day stand before the Lord, He is not going to ask us about what someone else did, but about what we did.

“Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else.” (Galatians 6:4 NLT).

I praise God for His mercy on my life and His Word that leads me. I am not perfect and I think this is an area that will always be tough for us as women. But I pray that we will become women who make our Father proud by living our lives to bring Him glory in who He has made US to be. You are unique, you are wonderful, you are beautiful, you are fearless and you are exactly who God has made you to be.

Run Baby, Run

It’s much easier to start then it is to finish.

 As of recent, I have started running with my mom. Not because I suddenly had a rush of blood to the head and thought it would be a good idea – but actually due to the fact that my mother (the little fitness machine herself) started to enter me into races with her. Um, what?! Anyway – rather than start WW3, I decided to take up the challenge and prove a point. So I started to run – my thought process was that if I run, I can still eat as much bread as I want until the wedding and not worry. Let me just emphasis that nearing the end of the run I didn’t care about bread, I didn’t care about being in shape for the wedding and I certainly did not care about the silly point I had to prove.

What I didn’t think during the time of sweat, stitches and complaining was that God would speak to me. But He did – and it wasn’t just a simple few words, it was what I consider as a holy download of a “now” Word.

He showed me how it is much easier to start then it is to finish.

The road seems to begin relatively smooth and easy…We start off fresh, full of zest on a new opportunity and see it as an exciting new adventure. We are so ready for everything that it has to offer and enthusiastically see all the positives of what the outcome could be.

But then a few bumps in the road start to occur…Nothing too serious. We navigate our way over them, still fueled by the fresh energy pumping through our veins and the positive attitude pumping in our heart.

But then the bumps become more frequent, and the hills seem to get steeper. The smile starts to fade from our faces as our calves start to hurt and our breath becomes shorter…Here’s the part when we start giving a second thought to our situation or circumstance. “Do we really want to do this?”, “This is much harder than I thought”, “Is this really worth it?”.

We can see the end is in sight…just a few more steps. We can do it but we feel out of breath, overwhelmed and struggle to overcome the temporary satisfaction of quitting with the desire to finish…This is usually when we quit. We just feel like our legs can’t carry us anymore, our hearts are weak and we have lost our joy.

If only we persevered, if only we realized we were almost there and if only we just endured… How true is this of life? Things happen that make us want to quit and give up everything we have worked for.

Whether we realize it or not – we are in the race of our lives. The key to running this race effectively and completely: Endurance.

Hebrews 12:1-2 – “Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God” (KJV)

Let’s consider this:

• Many have gone before us and have finished their race successfully. They now sit in the bleaches of heaven cheering us on.
• There are things that make this race harder than it needs to be. Notice what they are and make the decision to throw them off (they are weighing you down anyway.)
• Instead of looking down and counting the mountains that we are climbing – let us look up to Jesus – the Author and the Finisher of our faith.
• Jesus endured – we can too.

What a triumph it will be to finish and not just to finish, but to finish well. This goes against the norm – society tells us that when things get tough, just give up, get offended and live in your bitterness. But Christ gives us the opportunity to instead live in victorious freedom by turning our trials in triumphs and tests into testimonies.

Jesus never said this life would be easy, but He said that He would never leave us nor forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). The trials of life may seem to consume us in the moment – but they are nothing in comparison to the eternal glory at the finish line of our race. It is okay to trip and get a few bruises (in fact, its bound to happen)– as long as we get up, dust off the dirt and keep going.

Run Baby, Run.